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Long-Distance Relationship- how difficult is it to keep them alive?


“Distance is just a test to see how far love can travel”. Wait, what? Absolutely not! It’s more of judging one’s saturation level. Long-distance relationships aren’t just geographical separation between souls, it is about the separation of two Individuals who are now only technically together. The term long-distance relationship seems quite fantasizing to people, but unfortunately, it is more of an inevitable reality which only a few can accept. Being in a long-distance relationship requires more of your mental ability than physical. Are you ready to be insecure? Are you ready to develop trust issues? Are you ready to give justification for every small thing to your partner? Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to the world of ‘Long-Distance Relationship’.

Let us assume that you have been without friends since morning. You came back after clubbing with your friends which includes friends from the opposite sex too! You skipped the time that you gave your partner. It may sound weird or absurd to you, but trust me it creates a huge disaster! “Sorry I was busy hanging out with my friends so, I could not call you last night”. “What made you so busy with your friends that could not even let you drop a text message to me!” During this phase, your partner starts assuming all those Incidents which might have not even happened with you. At last, what they develop is a sense of insecurity. All they have to say is “you have changed since you shifted to another state/country”. Was that a matter of life and death? Perhaps it wasn’t, or maybe for the person who tried calling their soulmate just to know whether they are doing well or not. 

I believe, being insecure is a good virtue, but only to an extent. Being excessive of anything creates a problem. If you are completely secure and you have got nothing to do with your partner’s life, then why are you in a relationship? Don’t impose your ideologies on them. Give them open space, let them feel free. Don’t make yourself a lawyer and the second person a witness. Neither you are their guardian nor you are their boss who will instigate them every moment asking what they are doing. Let there be life, let there be love. Don’t hamper yourself and your partner because, at last, you are the one who would be facing the aftermath of your dispute. No matter how loyal you are in your relationship; one wrong statement from your side can change the entire game. What you are only left with are long WhatsApp text messages and no replies. At most you can expect is a “hmm” from the other side. 

In today’s era of change, it is very easy for an individual to shift from one person to another person. It won’t take time for them to say, “it’s not working” or maybe “it’s not worth it”. They leave you with a few memories and more of self-analysis that in spite of being loyal from your side you end up calculating your mistakes. After analyzing yourself, you start regretting which is the worst of all. You can overlook the fact of being insecure or not trusting upon your partner, but you legit can’t control regretting being into a relationship which was very stated by your partner that it did not work or it wasn’t worth it. 

Let us take an example, I hope you all might have seen the movie Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara where three friends go on a long day vacation (more of a bachelor’s party). Do you guys remember the character of Natasha (Kalki Koechlin) who was Kabir’s (Abhay Deol) fiancé? All that she did in the movie was doubting her fiancé assuming that he had an affair with Laila (Katrina Kaif) who was their driving instructor. Isn’t that hilarious! After watching that scene specifically, I concluded that, no matter how good or decent you are, once your partner has started being suspicious of you, you can’t get over this, which would end up your relationship with them. 

Breakups do not happen because of different communities, different generations, or different mindsets. It happens because of some toxic substances like trust issues, insecurity, excessive communications, not meeting at regular intervals, not giving the desired amount of time to each other. Talking constantly to each other and updating them from time to time of what you are up to is not the ultimate solution. 

Being in a long-distance relationship is more of a good thing because it shows the mature side of the person. You start being more concerned for your partner, you become more understanding, meeting them after a gap of a few months gives you immense pleasure. You get a lot of stuff to talk to your partner. You go out, explore new places, click a few beautiful pictures, and create new memories. At that time all you have in your mind and heart is your soulmate. You start thinking of spending your entire life with them. You start appreciating their differentness instead of fighting it. Their small mistakes do not make you lose your temper now. The biggest thing that one learns in a long-distance relationship is, ‘The Art of Expressing’. You start expressing what you feel for them.

“We can’t see each other physically, seeing each other on a video call is not just enough, you have got to meet each other. There are times when my boyfriend gets irritated when does not see me. It gets difficult when you are angry with each other, you fight for some reason and stop talking to each other”, says Eusebia Sangma, who is a student at Bennett University and staying in a long-distance relationship for the past three years. “I have known him since I was five, so we have a great bond and trust between us. He is not next to me so I am unaware of the fact that what he is going through, what thoughts he has in his mind, what he is feeling.”

[This story is not written by FeedByMe officially. The story covered by Aspiring Stuti Singh We don’t claim any possibility of anything.]